Such a threatening energy, I love it

Led me to this wonderful list

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_chemical_compounds_with_unusual_names

When I was about 4, I was jumping on the sofa, back and forth from one arm to the other (because the middle was lava, obviously)

Misjudged it and ended up going headfirst off the end into a china cabinet next to it, glass doors and all - I ended up missing the first month of school, 32 stitches and basically half a Glasgow smile to show for it, I’m told it looks very cool

NGL I kinda forgot about rugby, fair point

Europeans: call a game where you kick ball with foot “football”

Americans: call a game where you throw ball with hands “football”

One of these makes more sense to me… :p

H O N K

Welcome to one of the big unsolved problems in physics

When I started this company, I had only two things - a dream, and six million pounds

The orks are stupid, but also have psychic powers that mean if they believe something hard enough it just happens - eg they believe painting their ships red makes them go faster, so they do, and it works

Mountains? More like NOTHINGS

T̸͎͇̠̳͉͎̀̈́̀̽h̶̗̃̔́̈́̋i̴̳̖͖̗̬͙̣͇̊̀̎͂̈́̾̑̃͜͝ͅs̶̛͎͛̅̆̽́͊̎̈́̚ ̸̧̼͕̣͚̩͑̆o̵̞̥̺̳̼̅̓̈͆̕ṇ̵͚̳̓̇̆̆̊̄̚̚ȅ̴̳̰͖̜̝̪͔͈̑̀̀̅̒̄̔̚

In the UK you can’t even buy that many at once 😆 without a prescription at least - paracetamol and ibuprofen are usually 16 per pack and they don’t let you buy more than one of each

All hail the God Who Hates You Unconditionally 👌

Most of the major newspapers (this is from a UK perspective but I’d imagine they’re accessible in other places) have a live news page for big developing news stories - the BBC site is probably a good unbiased-ish one

I’m a big fan of -ussy as a suffix, especially when it’s wildly unsuitable for the purpose

It’s utterly ruined ales describing themselves as “citrussy”

In that picture? It’s a bee, contemplating leaping from the edge and ending it all after reading that article

Hold the newsreader’s nose squarely, waiter, or friendly milk will countermand my trousers.

To use another from the very late 1900s

The years start comin’ and they don’t stop comin’

The Dollop

Particularly the 1908 New York Paris Car Race episode