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Cake day: November 3rd, 2023

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  • I think it’s absolutely intentional. It feels like it’s written by and targetted towards people who are viscerally repulsed by pedophilia.

    It’s creating a situation that feels like absolute horror, and using that revulsion to help sell the horror. This centuries old mind, trapped in a child’s body, unable to properly experience things like sexually and romance, continually on the outside of everything, treated like a child despite her age and abilities…

    If I remember correctly, she ends up being this extremely bitter murdering monstrosity, out of rage and spite over her existence. Despite her angelic, innocent face, she’s the most evil of the lot. Partly because she doesn’t even have the option of interacting with humans properly, and even most vampires treat her poorly.

    And all because a character had a moment of moral panic, of pity for a poor child. A desire to do the right thing.

    It’s awful. And it’s supposed to be.






  • It’s not a thing to change, though? I guess there’s one aspect that might be addressable.

    I don’t enjoy sports, but I appreciate the skill and training that goes into it. No one could say anything that would make me enjoy watching any sports, but they could help me to appreciate it by better understanding the skills and stuff.

    So if you don’t like Doctor Who - same deal. It’s a matter of taste, that’s fine. If you don’t understand what there is to like about it, that’s all anyone could help you with.

    Me, I only really like the first few sessions of the reboot, with the 9th and 10th Doctor, because I appreciate a little more depth in my stories.

    Doctor Who appeals to so many people and a major reason for it is that it appeals on a number of different levels.

    There’s the escapism, of course. How many Whovians secretly (or not so secretly) wish they could hear the whine of the TARDIS’s engines, see the Doctor, and be whisked away? To adventure, to incredible sights and experiences, to feeling like they matter. That brings me to the next point, but just here for a moment - that escapism is uniquely profound in Doctor Who. A huge number of fans would accept being the Doctor’s companions, even knowing how badly it ends for so many of them. If I didn’t have a kid to take care of, I’d be on that list myself - I’d take a short, full, meaningful life over this bullshit any day. Even if I’m dead in 6 months, for those six months I’d live more than a hundred years the way I am now.

    There’s also the simple, pure joy of following the adventure of someone who’s just straight up a good guy. You can feel safe rooting for him, in your heart - he’s going to try to do what’s right, there’s no mixed feelings about that. It’s like a child’s story that way. And yet, he’s not just fighting cartoonish, childish enemies. Sometimes, yeah, but there’s often nuance, moral complexity, hard choices.

    Like the Pompeii episode where he had to decide whether to actively kill everyone in the town in order to save the world. And they didn’t blow it off, it was a painful choice, he wasn’t saved by a Deus ex machina at the end, he had to do it. He hurt for it - him and his companion Donna, they both strove to do what’s right and made this terrible choice.

    And yet, for all that heaviness that underlies so much of the show (and I swear, the writers love traumatizing the doctor), it still manages to be light-hearted and fun most of the time. Suitable to watch with your family.

    It’s real, and alive, and cheerful, and rich in a way so many shows aren’t. It’s fun and thought provoking.

    Yes, it’s incredibly stupid at times, no joke, and I’m not at all happy with some directions it took after the 10th. I finished Matt Smith’s run and then stopped watching.

    But there’s something beautiful and deeply compelling about it for a great many people. Ah, to be whisked away to adventure and purpose! Wouldn’t that just be brilliant?

    Edit: I can’t seem to figure out how to do spoilers on here…


  • You think that the statement “what LGBTQ+ says about x” is a comment that is possible to make sense?

    “LGBTQ+” is not an organization. It’s not a religion or a creed. It doesn’t “say” anything - and, in fact, isn’t even an “it” in the context you’re using!

    It’s a term for a group of people that have nothing to do with each other, other than some shared traits. In your comment, replace “LGBTQ+” with another word for a group of unrelated humans. “Blondes,” maybe, or “women,” “men,” “dark skinned folk,” “humans,” etc. You can’t put something like “Americans” or “Christians” in that sentence, because those are too specific.

    Can you see the problem now?

    Is it fair to post a video of some random dude saying something stupid, and then say, “I have proof that men believe X”?

    No, because “men” don’t share a creed.

    LGBTQ folk also don’t share a creed. We’re just people.

    And I absolutely believe you’d hear some folks joking around about “coming for their children.” A friend of mine jokes about the gay agenda all the time. Her gay agenda is “going to the grocery store to get milk.” But someone could get a clip of her saying that she’s got a gay agenda, easily.

    And thing is, even if that video happened to be about some folks who weren’t joking - it doesn’t mean anything! Just because someone found some random assholes at pride doesn’t mean that everyone who’s LGBTQ+ has an agenda.

    I’m probably wasting my time, I know, but I figured I’d put it out there just in case you are honestly misunderstanding the situation. Here’s hoping.


  • It’s annoying when monogamous people act like we’re all lying about experiencing compersion.

    Man, do I feel this. Why is it so hard to believe that people can feel differently about things?

    No, I’m not jealous and afraid my wife is going to leave me if she has sex with someone else. She isn’t when I do that, either.

    We’ll eagerly discuss all the juicy details. She loves hearing about my adventures. She’s more shy, so I hear more about who she’d like to be with rather than actual adventures. We both giggle and discuss people we’d totally bang and there really actually isn’t an undercurrent of anxiety about it.

    If I found someone that I started to fall in love with, isn’t that an awesome thing? Love is wonderful! And the sort of person that I could love would be someone that my wife would, at the very least, like. How does this not sound like a wonderful situation to people?

    Monogamy doesn’t make sense to me, though I respect people’s right to feel the way they do. If they feel jealousy, that’s allowed. If they think it’s better to have jealousy, then I’m confused, but whatever.

    It’s just weird that feeling differently gets such negative reactions and accusations of lying.


  • The way I think of it, there is no subtraction, and there is no division. Or square roots.

    There is the singular layer of operations (the adding/subtracting layer which I think of as counting, multiplying/dividing layer which I think of as grouping, etc).

    Everything within that layer is fundamentally the same thing. But we just have multiple ways of saying it.

    Partly because teaching kids negative numbers is harder than subtraction, and thinking of fractions is hard enough without thinking of it as a representative process of relationships via multiplication.

    Again, just how my brain does things. I’m not a mathematician or anything, but I’m pretty decent at regular math.


  • Yes, omg! And the world building idiocy drove me absolutely insane.

    Like, this one part where the were-something (might have been a werewolf?) was like, “only the first born of any pair of weres will also be a were” or something, and the immediate reaction… was to wonder why the were population wasn’t taking over the whole country or whatever. And the were took that seriously, saying the only reason their population wasn’t huge was a large number of stillbirths and such.

    They try to backtrack that a few books later, and deal with the actual consequences of the fact that they literally can’t increase their population without polyamory - clearly someone informed the author of how stupid that was - but still, that initial response was some of the most obviously not-thought-out world building I’ve seen.

    … okay, maybe that’s not true, but some of the worst I’ve ever seen in a book I continued to read, anyway.


  • It really is a matter of perspective.

    You’re saying that 10% of the population being awful means that a “huge number” are deeply broken.

    So then 90% are being good! Mind, it doesn’t take too many assholes to wreck things for everyone, but it is nice that the majority of folks really are trying to do their best. A sizeable majority, even!



  • None of this is saying don’t hit on women.

    It’s saying that some men are complete assholes when they’re rejected, and so it’s not a simple and straightforward thing to reject men.

    Don’t invalidate the experiences of women who have had reason to have trouble. Don’t say stupid shit like “just say no, why do women gotta do things like ghost people,” etc.

    And if you do hit on women, don’t give them a hard time for rejecting you! They’re allowed to say no, for any reason, and they aren’t required to justify themselves to you.

    But absolutely continue to pursue women - respectfully.



  • You might have had bad teachers and bad admin, true - but more likely, the school can’t do anything.

    I’m a teacher, and I cannot tell you how incredibly frustrated I am at how tied my hands are. The admin can’t do much, either.

    My options: talk sternly to the student. Talk sternly to the parent/guardians. And… that’s it.

    Send them to the office? Sure. The principal also has those two options, for the most part. Suspending students is something we only do in very rare circumstances, but they really, really try to avoid it, because so often, kids are acting out because of stuff at home, so suspending them only makes the behaviour worse.

    We can’t do detentions after school or on weekends - we can’t force parents to bring their kids in then. Lunch hour detentions, we can’t afford dedicated staff to run them, especially since we’d also need them to chase the students down, because it’s not like they’ll go just because they were told to. We can’t fail students any more.

    Our district has also even gotten rid of prizes for achievements - no more honor roll, no awards, nothing. Apparently this makes the low performers feel bad, and we couldn’t have that.

    And talking to the parents? Most parents are honestly great, but also, I never talk to them, because the kids with the great parents, I never need to call home. The asshole kids? Their parents are almost always a nightmare. And it’s a waste of time to talk to them.

    One kid last year, went after another kid’s field trip paperwork with a pair of scissors. Ripped into her like no one’s business. Sent an email home describing the situation. I was pretty sure, based on her history, she wasn’t really going to destroy his stuff, she was trying to get a rise out of him, so I said something like, “while I believe she was only intending to annoy him, not actually destroy property, it is critical for her to understand that this is absolutely unacceptable behaviour” or something like that.

    So rather than telling her kid off, mom goes to the principal to try to get me in trouble for calling her kid annoying.

    In application? Doesn’t matter what the teachers or even admin want to do. The district, province/state, and country have taken away practically every carrot and stick, when it comes to students with extreme behavior.

    It’s a huge mess.