• JackBinimbul@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    4 days ago

    Wife used to be a teacher. Key word USED to.

    Had a student who regularly threatened to kill her and destroyed her classroom at least twice a week. She would have to clear all the students into the hall while he went on a rampage in there.

    The AP would just come down and give him video games to “calm him down”. Guess who learned to freak out for rewards?

  • But_my_mom_says_im_cool@lemmy.world
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    4 days ago

    This isn’t even that bad.

    The reason bullies get away with being bullies at school is cause their parents also tend to be bullies. So when the little shit gets in trouble for being a bully, his fat parents will waddle in and bully the stuff and faculty for daring to discipline their little skid mark. Faculty don’t wanna deal with this, so they let the little shits get away with everything and only punishing the kids who fight back

  • MidsizedSedan@lemmy.world
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    4 days ago

    I’m a teacher assistant, 80% sure I want to go into teaching (students assaulting me isn’t holding me back. Its just the self confidence of stepping up and leading the class is what’s holding me back. And granted, I’m not in the USA, so I don’t fear school shootings)

    I’ve had students punch me. I’ve had students slam doors hard enough to break windows. But I also remember seeing the students learn something. The way their face lights up when they are smarter than their friend, or when they make a connection in math. THATS what is bringing me back to the classroom.

    The shy kid in yr 8 is now school captain. The kid I personally nicknamed ‘Cartman’ because that was his personality, is helping the new kid around school when teachers aren’t looking.

    Remember the good bits

    • Drasglaf@sopuli.xyz
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      4 days ago

      80% sure I want to go into teaching

      Judging by the rest of your message, I think you’d be a great teacher, you should become one.

      • MidsizedSedan@lemmy.world
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        4 days ago

        Thank you for the encouraging words. I was going to make a comment about “that’s 4 years of study, just for a maybe I will like it”. But this year (well, this July) marks 4 years of being a Teacher Assistant, and I’m still ready for another 4 years…

        All the signs say “go for it”, but the leadership…

        • Drasglaf@sopuli.xyz
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          4 days ago

          The decision is yours to make after all, and it’s a pretty important one. But I think any educational system (wherever you’re from, doesn’t matter) can always use more teachers that actually care for their students and aren’t there just to have a job, which isn’t always the case unfortunately.

    • tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip
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      4 days ago

      the self confidence of stepping up and leading the class is what’s holding me back

      You get used to it, especially after a few times of going through and refining your material. Once you have a clearer vision of the outcome you want a class to have, it’s a lot easier to figure out how you can guide groups of students to that point, even if the group dynamics change from year to year.

    • I Cast Fist@programming.dev
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      4 days ago

      The kid I personally nicknamed ‘Cartman’ because that was his personality, is helping the new kid around school when teachers aren’t looking.

      Should we be worried that Cartman is helping other kids, or is that a sign that he really grew and matured as a person?

  • Adulated_Aspersion@lemmy.world
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    4 days ago

    Dear Parent,

    In an effort to break the routine of unacceptable parenting, I would like to demonstrate what you can do with banans. First, get a large bunch of preferrably green bananas. Remove two of these bananas from the bunch. Take one banana, and insert the stem rigorously into your right ear canal. Repeat with the other banana in your left ear canal. Do not remove the banana until they begin to wither.

    And thats it!

    The effort to reduce your child’s violent outbursts remains the same, but at least you will be able to share your Superpower of Narrow Intelligence with the public! Everyone will unequivocally know that you are a moron.

  • LiveLM@lemmy.zip
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    5 days ago

    On top of all of this, at least in my country, the pay is shit. And no government past or present seems interested in changing it so…

    Always the same story on loop.
    “Nobody wants to work anymore” - Because the pay is shit.
    “We’re struggling to fill positions” - Because the pay is shit.
    "This generation is laz— The. Pay. Is. Shit.

    • ByteOnBikes@discuss.online
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      4 days ago

      I was getting paid more than my teacher friends working in the office being a entry-level data entry person. It sucks how we undervalue teachers.

  • taiyang@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    People will do anything but seek out a therapist. The kid may have a behavioral disorder, and seeking referrals for conduct disorder or something is usually a joint effort since parents get defensive even when such a disorder is often biological, like depression.

    Or, y’know, zero tolerance bullshit and the kid gets expelled. That’s more common in the US.

    • felixwhynot@lemmy.world
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      5 days ago

      Expelled? If they’re Black we just send them right to prison!

      Sadly this isn’t a joke

      • taiyang@lemmy.world
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        5 days ago

        Yes, depending on the age and if police are on campus. Police tend to be permanent on some campuses for “security” but schools with them statistically show a much higher rate of incarceration. Although expulsion is also a fast track to prison, too.

        Unsurprisingly, police tend to be in predominantly black schools, although even in desegregated schools (for which there are very few), it’s black students most likely to get in trouble for acting out. Socioeconomic status accounts for some of this, though.

          • Fushuan [he/him]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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            5 days ago

            By fucking the economy so hard they most people live paycheck to paycheck, no savings, and since there’s no universal healthcare people need to pay therapy from money they don’t have.

            This is by design, keep the poor poor so they don’t learn enough and get enough resources to change things. Things like fair pay and healthcare cost a lot to industries that pay lobbyists.

            If the current status is costing the government more than universal healthcare, who is pocketing the difference? Hospitals, insurance companies.

            Yeah, “they choose that”. “They” being the industries that pay lobbyists to make sure that “that” keeps happening, and “that” being US citizens not being able to afford therapy, in between other things.

    • Sc00ter@lemmy.zip
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      5 days ago

      My sister in law and her husband are these people.

      She had a kid in high school was non-verbal autistic that she gave up for adoption and ignored. Her first son with her husband was definitely on the spectrum and struggled hard in social situations and in school. School actually pushed for the diagnosis, but there were the “no way. Not my kid.” Kind of people. And did nothing.

      Their second kid came along and hes further along the spectrum than their other kid. He’s 6 and still not potty trained and barely talking. My 4 year old passed him developmentally a year or more ago, which seems to have been the catalyst for them to seek help.

      Both kids are doing better no that theyre seeing specialist and on development plans with the school. I just cant believe they waited so long… especially because her brother has a son who is also non verbal autistic, and his parents got him diagnosed before i even knew you could see those traits in children

    • ch00f@lemmy.world
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      5 days ago

      People will do anything but seek out a therapist.

      Bananas are a lot more affordable (for now).

    • Wirlocke@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      5 days ago

      I work at a school and I received training that explicitly told us zero tolerance does not work, made me do a double take. So in at least the northern states things are changing for the better.

      • taiyang@lemmy.world
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        5 days ago

        Yup, I teach at University in California and get to cite that. It’s a little counter intuitive for people, but it’s true and much better for teachers to understand. I imagine some places ignore data, though.

    • pjwestin@lemmy.world
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      5 days ago

      I mean, that depends on the age. If that kid is 7 or older, yeah, you should probably look into therapy to figure out where that behavior is coming from. 5 or 6, well, kids are still developing emotional regulation at that point. I’m not saying the reaction should be, “OK, we packed a banana,” but probably something more like, “Oh no, I’m so sorry, we’re going to have a talk about how it’s never OK to hit, have you witnessed this kind of behavior before?” then offer to pay for the glasses. (Also, packing a banana isn’t a bad idea, as well as making sure he’s getting enough sleep. 9 times out of 10, when young kid gets disregulated, they’re over-tired or hungry).

    • k0e3@lemmy.ca
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      5 days ago

      I’m here thinking people are so quick to insist on therapy. We don’t even know if they’ve tried to discipline their child like a normal parent should.

      • taiyang@lemmy.world
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        5 days ago

        In many ways, bad parenting is often why people go to therapy in the first place, haha. That said, I’m referring to something unrelated to parenting, as there are an assortment of disorders that have little to do with parenting.

        Also, discipline is tricky; parents have to use more than punishment in their toolbox, like praise for good work, modeling kindness, etc., and avoid modeling physical punishment since that tends to be the main reason a kid hit other kids… although I doubt the banana parents hit their kids.

        Screening can help identify the cause of problematic behavior. In the US, that legally is required by the schools in federal law (i.e. IDEA), but obviously enforcing said law isn’t happening, even in better administrations.

    • technocrit@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      4 days ago

      It’s kind of amazing how nobody suspects the teacher or the school when they’re the most obvious culprits in ruining the lives of children.

  • Professorozone@lemmy.world
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    4 days ago

    Punch a teacher in the face, get a free banana. Sounds like a great deal for the kid. Maybe if he shoots his teacher he’ll get a “calming Nintendo”.

    • justsomeguy@lemmy.world
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      5 days ago

      “it is very unfortunate that our Jaeydighn used the calming banana as a weapon but we believe it’s important for him to express himself freely and from now on we will peel it in an effort to make the impact softer for everyone involved.”

  • sparkles@piefed.zip
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    5 days ago

    As student services this year: two broken pairs of glasses, one broken finger, laceration to my face from flying objects, sexual assault (breast bitten, fingers rammed into my junk) among the more memorable. I spent the holidays limping from being knocked into a wall. A typical day includes being hit with items, punched, and kicked. I barely notice being physically assaulted or death threats. The SA was mainly notable because it became a dcf call. To be clear, the teacher or peer is the first target and the onus is often on them to protect the peer so they get the worst of it while being paid less.

    I wish them all the best, my last day is very soon.

  • biggerbogboy@sh.itjust.works
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    4 days ago

    All the problematic peers I’ve known either were born into a neglectful or hostile household, or were neurodivergent of some kind and didn’t fit in with the environment we were in, since those who were typical and were born into understanding families would just do what they were supposed to do.

    Due to how schools where I live are supposed to be looking out for signs of neurodivergence or other differences, while also being underfunded without a justification, many students aren’t even seen and once they get to middle or high school, they become the violent and problematic ones.

    Then again though, it’s also the parents’ responsibility to make sure their own child is heard and cared for to prevent such outbursts from happening in the first place, and those neglectful or hostile households are likely a result of the parents not understanding what being mentally healthy means.

  • michaelmrose@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    If you need a calming banana to not punch people not mistreating you in the face you are a garbage person

    • technocrit@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      4 days ago

      not mistreating you

      You think this kid chose to be in school? It’s violent coercion from the start.

      • Psythik@lemmy.world
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        5 days ago

        This “child” could be 7 or 17, which makes a huge difference regarding the appropriateness of their response. We need more context.

      • Passerby6497@lemmy.world
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        Nah, even as a child that’s unacceptable. My kid is only 5 and I don’t let them hit people, and punish them when they do. The response from the parent shows the apple fell straight down

        Edit: if you think this is advocating violence against children, go touch grass or read a single book on parenting ffs. Natural/logical consequences make good punishments for misbehavior, and have gone a long way to helping my kid not act out (and are nonviolent, since that has to be spelled out)

          • michaelmrose@lemmy.world
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            2 days ago

            It IS normal to punish 5 year olds. You don’t have to use violence to punish them. 5 years old is enough to understand consequences.

          • Passerby6497@lemmy.world
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            People who think you should teach kids not to hit people. And people who have enough braincells to rub together to understand that punishment and violence against children aren’t the same thing.

        • David_Eight@lemmy.world
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          I never said it was acceptable. Do you call you’re children garbage when they misbehave? Does their behavior improve after you tell your child that you think they’re garbage? I don’t let my children hit anyone either, I just don’t call them garbage if they do.

          • michaelmrose@lemmy.world
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            2 days ago

            Normal people don’t break the teachers glasses and punch them in the face. This is already major behavioral problems if your kids are school age and doing this.

          • Passerby6497@lemmy.world
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            4 days ago

            Punishing is much more than violence against children, and hitting them is one of the worst ways to punish for many reasons.

              • Passerby6497@lemmy.world
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                4 days ago

                Or maybe you talk to the kid and take away a privilege they have temporarily that is (at least close to) a natural consequence of behavior? But then again, I’m just a parent of a relatively well adjusted kid who isn’t violent and talks to me about their problems, so what the fuck do I know?

                Man, the amount of people who default “punishment” to “violence against kids” is fucking stupid.

              • Passerby6497@lemmy.world
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                4 days ago

                Show us on the thread where anyone advocated for hitting the kid? All I see is people assuming parents are going to hit the kid.

        • faythofdragons@slrpnk.net
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          5 days ago

          Yeah, it’s unacceptable, but it’s also unacceptable to call a child a “garbage person” for acting like a child.

          • michaelmrose@lemmy.world
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            2 days ago

            I wouldn’t call a particular kid a garbage person to or around that kid in consideration for the effect it might have on that kid. Between you and me kids who do that are a fucked up mess who probably aren’t going to end well.

          • Passerby6497@lemmy.world
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            Regardless of the labelling, punching someone in the face is absolutely not “acting like a child”, it’s acting like a garbage person. That shit should not be tolerated or excused away to complain about labelling.

            And honestly, excusing away a kid battering their teacher as “acting like a child” is pretty goddamned unacceptable too.

            • faythofdragons@slrpnk.net
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              My little brother threw a chair at his preschool teacher. This is absolutely shit kids do, that they need to be taught is unacceptable. You don’t teach kids to be better by writing them off as garbage humans, because they’re still learning.

              If you call your five year old garbage for acting out, you’re a shitty parent.

              • michaelmrose@lemmy.world
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                2 days ago

                How old is your little brother and how is his life going? If its going well I’m pretty sure it involved some intensive parenting or counseling.

              • Passerby6497@lemmy.world
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                4 days ago

                I’m always amazed at how little reading comprehension people have, or how they end up responding to things in their own head.

                1 - your example of your little brother acting like an asshole doesn’t mean it’s “shit that kids do”. This is “boys will be boys” shit, and that’s not acceptable. This is like saying your little brother throws rocks at moving cars or at animals and it’s just “shit kids do”. Misbehaving kids do it, and need to be taught better, but it is not normal kid behavior.

                2 - no one is saying they’re talking to the kid like that

                3 - part of teaching kids to be better people is showing them there are natural consequences for their actions, which guess what? That’s a form of punishment, and it isn’t violence.

                If you call your five year old garbage for acting out, you’re a shitty parent.

                I ask my kid what’s wrong and work with them to find a solution, and implement natural/logical (and because crayons are needed, non violent) consequences for their misbehavior. I may use choice descriptors for their behavior when they are not in the house, but I would never speak to my kid that way.


                It baffles me how many people in this thread don’t have a concept of natural/logical consequences as punishment, and it really fucking shows in the responses. But I guess when you’re raised with violence and can’t be bothered to look into alternatives, it’s easy to assume and drag people on the Internet

                • michaelmrose@lemmy.world
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                  2 days ago

                  Who in this thread advocated violence? I advocated selling the kids console to buy the teachers glasses and not getting him another one.

                • faythofdragons@slrpnk.net
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                  It’s amazing that you complain about people not reading and responding to stuff in their head, then you turn around it do it yourself.

                  1: I quite clearly stated that this was inappropriate behavior that needs to be educated away. I don’t know how you think my example is condoning the action. Children need to be taught to keep their hands to themselves, this is a normal part of child development. It is normal for children to have Big Emotions and not know how to use their words yet. Normal doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be addressed, it just means that every child has to have it addressed.

                  2: Have you not read the rest of the thread? Starting with the post calling the child a garbage person?

                  3: I never said anything to the contrary?

                  but I would never speak to my kid that way.

                  Then why are you defending it so hard?

              • LePoisson@lemmy.world
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                4 days ago

                You can call a kid being a garbage person a garbage person. Doesn’t mean you won’t help them and correct the behavior.

              • technocrit@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                If you call your five year old garbage

                It’s not enough to call them names. You gotta punish them! Didn’t you see the other comments? \s

              • Passerby6497@lemmy.world
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                4 days ago

                Sure, why not. Because all punishment is the job of the state, and no parent has the capability to punish their kid without violence, clearly.

                /S for those who can’t realize punishment and violence are not synonymous

      • technocrit@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        4 days ago

        This is how children are treated. They’re completely controlled, disempowered, and then hated. It’s completely normalized.

      • Soup@lemmy.world
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        5 days ago

        You shouldn’t be in charge of anything. That’s called being complacent and leads to even worse problems.