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@BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world • 2 days ago

Don't tell me what to do.

lemmy.world

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Don't tell me what to do.

lemmy.world

@BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world • 2 days ago
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  • Rodneyck
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    1•10 minutes ago

    I have moved on to egg rolls.

  • @nectar45@lemmy.zip
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    3•5 hours ago

    Just watch me motherfucker

  • @terminhell@lemmy.world
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    4•18 hours ago

    Well DUH! It’s summer idiots.

  • Applesauce
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    11•1 day ago

    My body, my choice.

  • @barneypiccolo@lemm.ee
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    13•1 day ago

    Several years back, I went to the store at the beginning of summer to get some foam pool noodles for the pool. I couldn’t find them anywhere, not even Walmart.

    The next spring, they were everywhere, but they all included a tag or sticker that read “Not to be inserted rectally.”

    So we had to go a summer without pool noodles so the government regulators could protect us against some butt stuff some weirdo tried.

    • @Anomalocaris@lemm.ee
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      10•1 day ago

      if you can shove a pool noodle up yer arse, I don’t think the government should tell you not too

      • @barneypiccolo@lemm.ee
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        8•1 day ago

        SOMEBODY should tell you not to!

        • @Anomalocaris@lemm.ee
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          2•1 day ago

          you just did, and that’s enough.

          if you don’t mind me, I’m going to get a pool noodle for research

          • @barneypiccolo@lemm.ee
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            2•1 day ago

            Well, have fun.

  • @wanderwisley@lemm.ee
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    19•1 day ago

    Bread 🥖

    • KingJalopy
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      5•1 day ago

      What goes up must always come down

  • @TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world
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    85•2 days ago

    • FartsWithAnAccent
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      23•2 days ago

      Hey it’s Cheryl or Charlene or Carina or whatever…

      • @loweffortname@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        23•2 days ago

        It’s CRYS-TAL!

    • @aeronmelon@lemmy.world
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      4•1 day ago

      Chaotic Good Karen.

  • @GooberEar@lemmy.wtf
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    13•1 day ago

    First they told us not to eat the yellow snow, now they’re telling us not to stick spring rolls up our poop chutes. It’s like doctors don’t want us to find any joy in our lives.

    • KingJalopy
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      4•1 day ago

      Or give them reasons to earn money while also telling crazy ass stories to their friends and family. Literally.

  • @LanguageIsCool@lemmy.world
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    4•1 day ago

    The new sexually frustrated boomer trend

  • @FancyPantsFIRE@lemmy.world
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    61•2 days ago

    “RFK questions guidance on not putting spring rolls up your anus.”

    • @Geodad@lemmy.world
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      15•2 days ago

      Is that him or the worm talking?

      • MushuChupacabra
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        13•2 days ago

        Maybe the worm likes spring rolls.

        • @dalekcaan@lemm.ee
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          2•1 day ago

          Do you have any idea how hard it is for a brain parasite to order takeout?

    • @Onyxonblack@lemmy.zip
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      3•2 days ago

      I’m not watching him and his grandchildren do this on live TV…

  • @genevieve@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    30•2 days ago

    FLARED. BASE.

    • @Machinist@lemmy.world
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      25•1 day ago

      Hindsight is always 20/20.

      • @gravitas_deficiency@sh.itjust.works
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        11•1 day ago

        I have so many questions about the train of thought that led to this… situation.

        • @over_clox@lemmy.world
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          2•14 hours ago

          I know right?! You could fit your entire wallet in there, and they’d never guess the password!

          Don’t ask how I know this, I don’t have any trucknuts…

        • @Machinist@lemmy.world
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          4•1 day ago

          I reckon a friend of theirs was looking for something real hard.

      • FerretyFever0
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        6•1 day ago

        Sunglasses? Really? Didn’t have any better objects? C’mon.

  • Caveman
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    6•1 day ago

    “Breaking news”

  • _AutumnMoon_
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    11•1 day ago

    Well, I wasn’t going to before, but now I am wondering what hidden secrets they are keeping from us??

  • @some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org
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    5•1 day ago

    A spring roll a day…

  • @elevenbones@sh.itjust.works
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    3•1 day ago

    Yeah probably the same “doctors” that give vaccines and think covid is real 😳

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