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The Picard ManeuverM to memes@lemmy.world • 4 days ago

Another productive meeting

lemmy.world

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Another productive meeting

lemmy.world

The Picard ManeuverM to memes@lemmy.world • 4 days ago
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  • @hakunawazo@lemmy.world
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    154•4 days ago

    Pro tip: Add a background image to your video conference for privacy.

    Most unsettling part here is toilet paper positioning (if not cat owner).

    • @HappySkullsplitter@lemmy.world
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      58•4 days ago

      The toilet paper is loaded backwards

      • @marduk@lemmy.sdf.org
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        27•4 days ago

        Every time my ex would reload, she loaded it this way. Every time I found it this way, I would reverse it

        • @hakunawazo@lemmy.world
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          26•4 days ago

        • @Hawke@lemmy.world
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          14•4 days ago

          I’m pretty sure this was a contributing factor in my parents divorce.

      • @GFGJewbacca@midwest.social
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        -10•4 days ago

        Excuse me, that’s the best way to load toilet paper. The best overall, however, is a bidet. Ascend, my child.

        • @Cheradenine@sh.itjust.works
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          20•4 days ago

          Is there a way on Lemmy to downvote and upvote at the same time?

          The first part of your statement says you should up your meds, the second part is lucid though.

          • @Bgugi@lemmy.world
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            6•4 days ago

            Lemmy needs to distinguish itself with character-level voting. Somebody made a great post but unironically used an interrobang? Hit 'em right in the analytics.

            • @Denjin@lemmings.world
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              7•4 days ago

              What did you just say about the interrobang‽

              • @LilB0kChoy@midwest.social
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                0•4 days ago

                What’s an interrobang‽

            • Seeker of Carcosa
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              1•3 days ago

              “Exquisite use of an interrobang, good sir. I doff my fedora to thee.”

    • just some guy
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      31•4 days ago

      As a cat owner, you’ll never catch my rolls in this blasphemous position. Kitty’s getting misted if he confuses hanging TP as a toy

    • @nexguy@lemmy.world
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      19•4 days ago

      So it would look like you are chest deep in a toilet. It’s the way I prefer it anyway.

      • @RobotZap10000@feddit.nl
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        25•4 days ago

        How do you poop? A chart showing exciting new pooping postures that break the current boundaries of the pooping experience.

        • @MotoAsh@lemmy.world
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          4•4 days ago

          ahaha I love how the only one getting shit everywhere is literally Drumpf. Accurate.

        • LousyCornMuffins
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          2•4 days ago

          none of these there’s not enough crying

    • @Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      11•4 days ago

      Cat owner… my stupid bois have found a way to empty the roll even when it’s placed like that. Nothing is safe.

    • @Venus_Ziegenfalle@feddit.org
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      6•4 days ago

      if not cat owner

      Bend the cardboard roll on the inside so it becomes oval-shaped. That way it doesn’t keep unrolling if they pull on it

    • @SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world
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      5•4 days ago

      That would not stop a cat

    • @rovingnothing29@lemmy.world
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      1•4 days ago

      The toilet paper is correctly installed

  • @gaterush@lemmy.world
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    68•4 days ago

    A bonus is you can invite your dental hygienist over and have your teeth cleaned while you work

  • @mvirts@lemmy.world
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    59•4 days ago

    chokes to death on coffee

    • @RedPostItNote@lemmy.world
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      15•
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      4 days ago

      Dies by monitor to face

      • @Denjin@lemmings.world
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        9•4 days ago

        At least he died doing what he loved. Being in a Teams call about interdepartmental efficiencies.

  • @sprite0@sh.itjust.works
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    52•4 days ago

    the startup i worked for got bought by a mega corp. They taught us devs how to use some intranet forms to order things we needed like keyboards and mice. These items would get approved or rejected by the engineering manager and it was pretty straightforward.

    I put a request into the system for one of these (well one very similar, the Scorpion) thinking my boss would see the $50k request and jokingly refuse it.

    What i did not know was that any request over a certain dollar amount triggered a review, by sending the request to my bosses boss. And over ANOTHER amount it did it again. I got a talking to but it was worth it to imagine the face on some VP seeing a dev try to order a $50k chair

    • @TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works
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      13•4 days ago

      I bet they were laughing too before pretending to be mad

      • LousyCornMuffins
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        5•4 days ago

        yeah, i bet they were trying to think of ways to reject it for op but approve it for themselves

  • FundMECFS
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    31•4 days ago

    I don’t think people realise that these setups (less exaggerated) are usually for disabled or chronically ill people unable to sit up.

    • @Korhaka@sopuli.xyz
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      12•4 days ago

      So me on a Wednesday morning after a questionable amount of moonshine the night before?

      • FundMECFS
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        4 days ago

        For some chronic illnesses. Yeah. But imagine that for life. And that’s the best you feel. It can get worse. Sometimes for long periods, you don’t know if you will get back even to the that “shitty best you feel”. And even at your best, you barely feel a fraction as good as a healthy person.

        You don’t get to feel okay your birthday, or on christmas, or when you need to do something special. You just feel ill, like a bad hangover or bad flu, in perpetuity.

        That’s the reality for a lot of severe chronic illnesses.

        • @SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          4•4 days ago

          That’s me today! I’m playing my favorite game: chronic illness or acute illness?

  • @MissJinx@lemmy.world
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    28•4 days ago

    this does no look confortable

    • @Dabundis@lemmy.world
      cake
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      22•4 days ago

      If you use both hands to type the mouse would either fall off or be damgling from its cord

      • @marduk@lemmy.sdf.org
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        17•4 days ago

        I think it’s a trackball stuck in place but I could be wrong

        • @ahornsirup@feddit.org
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          10•4 days ago

          Congratulations, you made it worse.

        • @MissJinx@lemmy.world
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          5•
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          4 days ago

          Indeed even worse

      • @hddsx@lemmy.ca
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        6•4 days ago

        Use a trackball and tape the base to the desk?

        • Skua
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          16•4 days ago

          Tiny jet engine that thrusts uphill to counteract gravity whenever your hand isn’t on the mouse

          • Farid
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            6•4 days ago

            Electromagnets engage when you release the mouse.

  • @CtrlAltDefeat@sh.itjust.works
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    26•4 days ago

    Can get a dental cleaning during meetings, awesome

    • @dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world
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      10•
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      4 days ago

      Combining “company quarterly review” with “dental cleaning”, while time efficient, is a kind of sensory combo that’s right up there with “nuts and gum”. Sounds great until you think it through a bit.

      Edit: I’ve actually done the latter by accident. 1/10 - “I don’t know what I expected.”

      • @Skullgrid@lemmy.world
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        6•4 days ago

        “nuts and gum”

        together at last!

    • @SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      7•4 days ago

      Put a big hole in that incline and your proctologist can do their thing too!

  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮
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    23•4 days ago

    How’s Eternal Death Slayer 3 coming along, JP?

    • @otacon239@lemmy.world
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      14•4 days ago

      Do you like my music?

      You would if you had ROBOT EARS

    • @FeelzGoodMan420@eviltoast.org
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      3•4 days ago

      Mmmm beeb boop please sit on my face mmmm

    • @Sc00ter@lemmy.zip
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      2•4 days ago

      Im thinking about getting robot legs. Its a risky procedure

  • @jaschen306@sh.itjust.works
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    15•4 days ago

    thud oh sorry, brb… my mouse just slid off my table.

    • @TheOakTree@lemm.ee
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      4•
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      4 days ago

      You would probably want a wired mouse for this one… maybe it could work like a bungee?

      • @nelly_man@lemmy.world
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        5•4 days ago

        Or a trackball mouse that’s secured in place.

      • @jaschen306@sh.itjust.works
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        1•4 days ago

        I think someone should invent a magnetic mouse

  • @Etterra@discuss.online
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    10•4 days ago

    Good luck getting up to pee.

    • @shoo@lemmy.world
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      14•4 days ago

      Plenty of places to hang a catheter

      • LousyCornMuffins
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        1•4 days ago

        they make these things called condom catheters

  • Drunk & Root
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    5•3 days ago

    all fun and games until thr back of the monitor falls off

  • @Gates9@sh.itjust.works
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    4•3 days ago

  • @subterfuge@lemmy.world
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    13•4 days ago

    Doubles as a hospital baby delivery bed, so you can work through labor.

    • @Cort@lemmy.world
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      3•4 days ago

      Oh America, what will you think up next?

  • @WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    12•4 days ago

    Why isn’t this the standard?

    • @bob_lemon@feddit.org
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      24•4 days ago

      Because the mouse falls off the table the second you start typing.

      • @Korhaka@sopuli.xyz
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        11•4 days ago

        Magnetic mouse?

        • @DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social
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          11•4 days ago

          If there’s one thing I like it’s resistance as I move my mouse

        • @SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org
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          10•
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          4 days ago

          A trackball mouse attached to the desk is the obvious solution. Velcro would work.

      • @musubibreakfast@lemm.ee
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        3•4 days ago

        This is why you have the mouse grafted to the employee’s hand for optimal efficiency

      • @WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        2•4 days ago

        Magnets, bro, how do they work? /s

      • @MysteriousSophon21@lemmy.world
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        1•4 days ago

        trackball mouse solves this probelm, been using one for years and it’s a game changer for weird setups like this lol

  • Tarquinn2049
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    10•
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    4 days ago

    That looks a lot more expensive than just a VR headset and a recliner or bed you likely already own. And in VR you can pick whether it’s 3 monitors, or one seamless curved triple-wide, no matter what you own in real life. And you can keep the monitor(s) with you when you stand up if you want.

    But, what I’m curious about… how is this a “shoes on” occasion?

    • The Picard ManeuverOPM
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      13•4 days ago

      But, what I’m curious about… how is this a “shoes on” occasion?

      Work dress code.

      • Tarquinn2049
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        4•4 days ago

        Hehe, fair.

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